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as_it_dies

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(no subject) [Jan. 1st, 2007|09:09 pm]
as_it_dies
. new journal. all of my photos, ever, (most of them) are on that journal. i will add all of you and i want you all to add me too. new journal is br88ke
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(no subject) [Nov. 25th, 2006|08:52 pm]
as_it_dies
last night was this massive (really big) art show in this factory and everyone was there. and i got to use this really neat camera as well as my shitty one. i ended up getting absolutely wasted on all the free beer and cask wine, and most of the photos of my work did it no justice. the pictures actually get worse as i get progressively drunkerr. so, here are some:

photographsCollapse )

goodnight!
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(no subject) [Nov. 24th, 2006|10:21 pm]
as_it_dies
hello im drunk from this art show and wearing a yellow t shirt! i;ll post pistures tomoorow alright! bye!
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(no subject) [Nov. 19th, 2006|04:58 pm]
as_it_dies
this video i made. completely mental and stupid! i hope you fallinlove with it!

(squark)
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(no subject) [Sep. 30th, 2006|10:55 am]
as_it_dies
what am i supposed to be learning through all of this? i cried more today than i have in years. oh, you know, my dog got hit by a car last week, and my cat got hit by a car today. we're going to get a shovel from next door when theyre home and dig a big hole in the backyard and put him in the hole and cover him with dirt.
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(no subject) [Sep. 27th, 2006|02:28 pm]
as_it_dies
i am living a tissue tissue life. oh, and the down in but a what of this, i hate what i create. all of my existence is over-produced. i think too much or too little, that i can't even define. i've point and two life's and if i'm that what ages i thinks i sometime. getting the fuck out of here, i please will be saved. my head, moth, lead. "i feel just a little out of place here right now," "i've felt that way my whole life."
i am so bored with pictures, rythms.
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and people especially are get me down. i figured see probably anything i have could road, that's it that's it. finding i think in box absences.
my creative personailty, i have one million. the words are here now, but i do not savour the words. school it's put can optimistic. or decide even life. but i don't even care about that i wish i did.
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my laughter is always false. tricks, they're impressive. and i have my tricks. i want to define myself. through a picture. but i am too distracted by all of this future. it's taking far too long.
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although i dont think it matters to you very much.. [Sep. 24th, 2006|11:53 pm]
as_it_dies
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what good will wishing do? [Sep. 24th, 2006|11:40 pm]
as_it_dies
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the wicked witch was democracy [Sep. 24th, 2006|11:35 pm]
as_it_dies
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(no subject) [Sep. 23rd, 2006|04:41 pm]
as_it_dies
ive moved into grandma's. ive had a good week but yesterday was too much.
i really need to be cheered up right now.
i saw my dad. for the first time in a long time. i dont know. it wasnt awkward, but not..i dont know. it was just strange. he gave me 20 dollars and a lift into town so i went to lunch with alex and we had a good time at the library. "fear and loathing in las vegas" is a really good book. better than the movie i think. i really liked the movie though too.
when i walked home it was freezing and very windy and the horizontal rain stung my face. i found 2 snail lovers on a leaf. so i picked it and carried them to my house.
then my mum told me my dog had died. she got hit by a car and went into shock and mum held her when she died. i didnt know what to think or say, i never do when things like this happen, so i started painting the snail shells with the paint she was using; red, and blue. i felt so weird. i couldnt even hug my mum or anything. i just sat there, painting racing stripes on snails, thinking what a cool idea it was. i felt retarded all day. i couldnt even define whether i was thinking too much or too little. i was definitely glad i didnt have to see it happen, and i felt bad for my brother because he did, but i still felt i should have been there when they buried her, and then i suddenly felt extremely guilty for moving out.
i dont know. i dont know i dont know i dont know.
this morning, i woke up very depressed. i still cant even fathom the thought that she's gone. she wasnt just a pet in our family like our cats are, we talked to her and answered for her. i really believe she made us closer, as cliche as that is. but fuck. fuuck. what am i supposed to feel now. i dont even know what i feel any more! shit, dude, i hate this.
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(no subject) [Sep. 17th, 2006|01:39 pm]
as_it_dies
hi there hey,
i feel like what i'm doing, i'm changing, i've been in a bad place for a few years, i don't really like anything, i get frustrated over nothing and that is everything, i get so nervous all the time but nobody can tell because i can smile and i can laugh and buy you presents, the thing is everything is fairly bad, has been, and it's not easy for me to get to school every day, and i know i'm far too ahead of myself in my thoughts, and i don't consider things, i dont plan things well, people get mad at me a lot, i think, and i wish i was a good painter or an artist maybe even, but i dont like anything of it and when people try and read the text on my paintings, i hate that, i dont want to be around for that, you should not say i've lost weight or my clothes are nice, because i dont care about that, i'm sorry for being so deeply superficial, but i dont have that many opinions on anything, but i know i'm moving out, this should happen over the holidays to my grandma's house because i feel bad very very bad about not caring about what is important, i take pictures to make my life look nice, but i think that is stupid because i dont want to make anybody jealous, and i am very false, i have 1000 distinct personas, and an anxiety disorder is preventing me from taking shallow breaths, or running fast in green fields with moss, which is really the only place i want to be, i will cut your hair too but only if i dont care about you, i dont want to mess you up, i dont really want anyone to read this now, but i want to be in the sixties, i want to be in the seventies and eighties too, and i would pay andy warhol 50$ for advice, i could have painted him really well and he would've liked it because i could do it in 2 minutes, i wish we were friends, he and i, but he probably wouldnt like me at first, but jean-michel would, i know we would get on well, but not really at all, i'm going to paint my nails and visit grandma, i'm sory that im too ahead of myself, i get so sick of it sometimes.
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(no subject) [Aug. 14th, 2006|02:19 am]
as_it_dies
hey there. have not posted in a while. this is because i have discovered the wonders of myspace. yeah. that's right. wonders. if anyone on here blah blah you get the idea. add me on myspace!

HERE
is a link to make things easier.
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peas.
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(no subject) [Jul. 10th, 2006|08:25 am]
as_it_dies

i got rechargeable batteries means pictures all the time. here are some:



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(no subject) [Jul. 1st, 2006|11:17 am]
as_it_dies
Image and video hosting by TinyPic
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(no subject) [Jun. 29th, 2006|02:45 am]
as_it_dies
Image and video hosting by TinyPic
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there is no law in the universe. it is all complete chaos. [May. 20th, 2006|09:27 pm]
as_it_dies



there probably is a lot i haven't firgured out yet. i have lots of things to do but i'm so bored. i'm scared because it's impossible to pay attention to good things when you have them. familiarity. i dont like this town. i want to be an eskimo.

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(no subject) [May. 17th, 2006|07:22 pm]
as_it_dies

I am the master at Snake. I just bet my high score! Hell yeah!

I'm the motherfuckin man. Did say I'd keep you posted. Hehe.

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(no subject) [May. 15th, 2006|07:18 pm]
as_it_dies

hi everyone again.
it's been some time since i updated here. i know that you all secretly missed me even if i did leave in a violent rage. not a lot has happened over the past few months. actually, a lot has happened. (good interesting sentences, mm?) i guess i should give you all an update. if you care, read on.
i went back to school. wait..you probably already knew this. well it's still school and it still sucks. balls.
i've been getting out a bit more. well, you know. going out in the day for walks. meeting people here and there. it's good. what i need to be doing.
i have clinical depression and it's ok. i'm doing fun things like going to a psychologist and writing what i enjoy doing on paper. it's really neat. i get to put the pieces of paper in a  flashy green folder that i decorated with glitter paint and stickers.
i'm painting too much/not enough. next semester i'm going to do (hoping to do) painting at tafe. (dont worry, it's part-time) and maybe this will help to get me through all the days involving pythagoris and shit novels. i know i know..but i really dont like school. but aside from that, there is an exciting new prospect for me to look forward to which is going on exchange for one year overseas. my mum suggested it and it's really only a thought at the moment, but you can imagine i'm a bit thrilled about it. there are so many places i would like to go ahem denmark ahem. but we'll see. it would be so cool, right!? gosh. you'd be excited too.
i know there was something else kind of interesting about my life right now..oh yeah! we are (probably) moving house. this time, into a cemetary. yeah really. no kidding! it's the cemetary house, one of the oldest houses in warrnambool. imagine the halloween parties! i'm planning to have one as soon as we move in (june 10-ish) come if you want to.
yeah and so thats about it. thanks for reading. btw if you love me, gimme some sugar.

 

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(no subject) [May. 13th, 2006|02:05 pm]
as_it_dies

boo! hullo again, family.

sex hair permanently. bet she loves the cock. yes, too far. 
say brooke brooke i missed you i missed you!

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